“I am only a sparrow amongst a great flock of sparrows.” Evita Peron

 

charcoal & oil on paper25x36 cm (10x14)

charcoal & oil on paper
25×36 cm (10×14)

Flocks of dusty blue colored birds with darker blue heads, come to the feeder every day. In groups of 25 –50 plus, they eat all the seed, all the suet, drink all the water and move on.  The ring neck doves and smaller birds just wait patiently, then peck at the remains.  I go out and re-fill the tray, re pack the suet cage, re-fill the water bowl, knowing tomorrow another group will come.  It’s beginning to get expensive, aside from looking like something out of a Hitchcock movie!  It is the first time ever I have seen so many birds at the feeder. Perhaps it is because the weather is still basically fall with warm days and freezing nights; there are even robins still dancing around.  This will soon change we are being told, as a front moves in next week and winter may finally come, bringing perhaps, maybe, ok we’re not sure, some much-needed moisture in the form of rain or show.

Am enjoying my seasonal job, but what few hours I have are being cut for lack of business.  It’s happening everywhere a true trickle down effect of fear of what will happen come January.  Stupid games congress plays are hurting everyone. But I am thankful for the hours that I have, not much I can do about it anyway!

Art wise I am playing around with movement and color, doing some random sketches working in charcoal and oil on paper (sketch 1 above).  Keeps me out of trouble, kills time, and helps me to loosen up my structured self.  Put together another book of drawings. This one is Women and Fish, it’s for sale on-line at Blurb (http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/3809483 ) and I will sell copies at the exhibit of the those drawings in February at The Watermelon Gallery here on the mountain.

Been having strange deep dreams, terribly symbolic. One in particular stands above the rest:  I was getting a painting ready for an exhibit when I noticed the right side was torn and the stretcher broken.  I did my best to fix it and holding it in front of me I asked an unknown entity how did it look.  “Something is wrong”, they said. When I looked down at the painting, it and I had melded together. I turned my head and saw in a rear mirror my human back and legs.  I awoke distressed. Took me a few days to see beyond the symbolism, and I realized that not only were my paintings and I one, but they defined who I was.  Notice the past tense here, because this is why I feel so lost at times.  When something that defines you is taken away, it takes a bit of magic to redefine who and what you are! I am still working on that aspect.

Well, enough of that! Besides the end of the world is coming, or at least a change in world conscience, I can only hope for the latter.  So if we all survive that….and we actually get some snow, well the rest is pudding for a Christmas dinner.

 

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