Definitions

Posted: December 3, 2011 in painting adventures, Uncategorized
Tags: , , ,

“If I didn’t define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people’s fantasies for me and be eaten alive.” Audre Lorde

There have been so few people in my life that actually stood up for me, put themselves in front of me to protect, risks their own well being in my defense, that I can count them on 3 fingers. I am most fortunate.

When you shine a bright light you do attract bugs, big bugs, little bugs, small hard ones, slimy crawly ones, ones that bite, ones that sting, ones that try to poison your world. Having spent a lot of time squashing things that tried to keep me down, I have learned to recognize bugs from a distance. Even when they wear a disguise.

As I continue this series of  “Works in Blue” I have a chance to look at the marvelous talented women who were, are, and always will be my friends; whether we are in contact regularly or not.  They who touched my life, my soul, sometimes only for a moment.

“Green Stems” represents one of those fingers. She rallied without fear to raise her voice, to protect, to justify, to defend, not only me but also the others that stood next to me whom I defended.  In the end we all lost to a negative force much larger than ourselves, but gained a soul bonding that would last many lifetimes.

I think when we seek to define ourselves, the definition sometimes interferes with the pre-conceived definition others have of us. The illusion of another, created by not being able to hear or see things clearly except though their personal lens. Everyone thinks everyone else has an agenda, and when a chance meeting occurs of someone who has no agenda, it throws them off balance. Many will just walk away unable to deal with such a proposition, other will attack as if their lives depended on the destruction of the different.

We are here for such a short time, it takes so long to understand and learn, it takes so long for most of us to step outside of our own egos and see the world today as it is: naked, raw, unrefined, sad, filled with hunger, poverty, suffering and pain, it seems there is so little pure joy.

A long time ago there was a “Twilight Zone” episode that dealt with the concept of:  is reality a dream or do we dream our own reality? Now science thinks perhaps the three-dimensional world we live in is all our own illusion.  I have always held that suspicion that perhaps it was all smoke and mirrors of another’s madness.

Whatever it may or may not be, what stands clear is when for a brief moment in time one soul touches another, a gift of friendship is given and there is no greater treasure or illusion.

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